Wednesday, 11 February 2015

47 signs you're a medical student

Signs you're a medical student

1) You worry about how hungry you get in anatomy - it's quite normal to compare lunch options over an open cadaver.
2) Casually eating said lunch right after an anatomy session and not even feeling weird about it.
3) You can't go a full day without chocolate.
4) You spend more time dreaming about your bed than actually in it.
5) When you buy clothes you comment on whether it would be suitable for clinical placements or not.
6) You shake at the words "candidates, please stand outside your stations".
7) You constantly diagnose yourself with everything you read about. I go to the toilet twice at night... I'm always tired... I MUST HAVE DIABETES!!!
8) Your post-placement nap is the  best part of your day.
9) Doctor: "So you can come back at 4pm, or I'll be around tomorrow. It's your education". You: "Errr yes, see you tomorrow!"
10) A 9am start becomes a lie-in.
11) 10am becomes a normal time to eat lunch.
12) You have used a medical textbook as a pillow in the library.
13) You've lost count of how many times you've said, "Hello my name is [insert here] and I'm a 1st/2nd/3rd/4th/5th year medical student".
14) You go through about 257689 tubes of moisturiser after washing your hands over 50 times in an hour.
15) You regularly worry about how you're going to do an audit, present a poster, get something published, and be in loads of societies on top of uni work.
16) Taking your top off in lessons is standard practice.
17) You learn what the spinothalamic tract does and then forget it the second you leave the exam room.
18) You feel so poor when your school classmates graduate, get married, get a job and have babies whilst you still have a lifetime left in university. I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE.
19) You understand what dysdiadochokinesis and hepatocholangiocystoduodenostomy mean.
20) Not being able to watch Casualty without criticising everything. They're doing what with that endoscope?!
21) Using Embarrassing Bodies as a revision tool.
22) You start to detest your fellow keen colleagues that keep you away from your bed.
23) That moment when blood spurts everywhere when cannulating someone and you have to act like it's all planned.
24) Keeping composed during rectal examinations.
25) Sitting around for hours waiting for doctors to turn up. And maybe taking a quick nap during that time.
26) That awkward jerky movement you make when you fall asleep during an MDT meeting, due to not being able to have that quick nap.
27) Either feeling invisible or interrogated during a ward round.
28) Coming out of an isolation room and wanting to rip your clothes off and dunk your head in a bath.
29) Embryology becomes the bane of your life. You never want to see another mesoderm in your life.
30) Your phone has more medical apps than text messages.
31) Not realising how hard multiple choice exams can be. There are 20 possible answers??!
32) You still don't have an answer to the question, "Why medicine?". Ermmm it looks cool on TV and I want to help people...
33) You can't leave a textbook open in the library when you go to the toilet. Someone may realise that you're studying vaginas.
34) "3, 4, 5 keeps the diaphragm alive", "2, 3, 4 keeps the poo off the floor" and "Oh Oh Oh, To Touch And Feel Very Green Vegetables AH!" (or some ruder variety) makes sense.
35) The best part of getting your NHS badge is 50% off Dominos. Oh yes.
36) Tortora is a life-saver in first year. And you won't admit it but you still dip into it now to revise renal physiology.
37) Study breaks are the best thing ever. FOOOODDD!
38) You wonder how anybody could ever turn out to be normal after learning about the long list of birth defects.
39) You have seriously contemplated intercalating just to get one last long summer holiday.
40) And you wonder why you ever complained about how long school terms were. You definitely didn't appreciate half terms enough.
41) You're afraid to go to a doctor for your own medical ailments, and when you do you don't want to admit that you're a medical student.
42) You have spent many hours wondering why you are putting yourself through medical school, questioning whether you will ever be confident enough to be a doctor and thinking about all of the other jobs you could do instead.
43) You have had an awkward conversation with your family/non-medical friends/random stranger regarding holding an [insert random organ here] today.
44) You constantly wonder what you did with your time in your first year.
45) Your grandparents tell everyone they meet that their granddaughter/son is going to be a doctor.

But most of all...
46) Your parents and family are so proud of you, and you get a thrill whenever someone is impressed that you're studying medicine (and possibly be a little embarrassed).
47) On the good days you realise that you're studying the best thing in the world, and that all the hard work will be well worth it in the end.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born, and the day you find out why.
                       - Mark Twain



11 comments:

  1. Literally every single one of these is true!! I'd forgotten about anatomy-induced hunger - it's been a couple of years since I stepped into the dissection room (I hated that place). And on ward round this week I actually got asked to identify the plant on the patient's table. New levels of interrogation right there...
    Jennifer x
    Ginevrella | Lifestyle Blog

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    1. I know I don't do anatomy this year which is good, but it was awful getting hungry over cadavers last year! Hahaha that really is a new level, that is ridiculous!

      Hannah xx

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  2. I love this post - and you seem like such a lovely person :) I'm a psychology student so can relate to a few of them - not many but still! You have a great blog :) xx

    Sam | Samantha Betteridge

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    1. Awww thank you so much Sam! :) Psychology is quite similar to Medicine in some ways so I bet you can relate to a few of these :) xx

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  3. These are so true haha, I though #21 was only me but apparently not... I feel like I spend half my life waiting for doctors to show up!

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    1. Nope, Embarrassing Bodies is the best revision aid out there. Yes same, I spent 2 and a half hours waiting for a consultant yesterday! xx

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  4. Haha I love this post (and your blog!) Getting hungry over anatomy.. I thought that was just me! I wonder why it happens it's so weird I get SO hungry whenever I step foot in HARC!

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    1. Thank you Beth! I know, I think it's something to do with the chemicals they use to preserve the bodies... Bit grim really haha xx

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  5. Haha I found this through Jennifer's blog - I'm a doctor and I find every single one of them to be still true now! But it is totally worth it in the end. :)

    Saskia

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    1. Thanks for your comment Saskia! I really hope it's worth it in the end :) xx

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  6. Wonderful, everything is true about medical student. Being a medical student it looks like all the signs are made for me. Awesome post.

    Thanks.

    Idiomatic Lilly

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